आज फिर हँसी में इक ग़म को छिपा लिया...

It is everyday that we come across a lot of less privileged people around us. But it is rare that we take some time out to be with them and help them to rise from the place they are stuck in. I went to meet a few such kids today...sat with them, talked and played with them... and it brought so much of relief to me. But I realized it was impossible for me to not to think about them after leaving from there. And so, I couldn't help but write what I observed when I was with them. Such strong people they are, fighting everyday for survival, yet making it seem as though it is nothing so difficult. We reach out to some, but still there are many who don't receive our support. If you can feel what I am trying to convey through this piece of writing, then please try and contribute towards a better future for these people, in whatever possible way you can. Every effort, no matter how small it is, can be a huge step in building a better tomorrow.


आज फिर हँसी में इक ग़म को छिपा लिया,
बिन आहट चलने वाली धड़कन को साज़ का नाम दिया,
परछाइयों में जीने वाली आँखों को रौशनी कह दिया,
और दुनिया को फिर एक मुखौटे में ख़ुद से मिलवा दिया...

कितने  मुखौटे हैं यहाँ सब के
हर मुखौटे का अपना सच,
कितनी चोटें हैं लगीं हर दिल को
हर चोट का अपना दर्द,
इन  मुखौटों को, इन चोटों को
आज फिर खुद में समां लिया
आज फिर हँसी में इक ग़म को छिपा लिया...

हर दिन की सुबह  नयी
हर सुबह की शाम नयी
इन आँखों में फिर भी
न सुबह नयी, न शाम नयी
ख़ुशी ने दस्तक दी भी कभी तोह लगा यूं
ज़िन्दगी छीन न ले यह भी मुस्कान कहीं,
आज फिर दुनिया को एक झूठ से रूबरू करा दिया
आज फिर हंसी में इक ग़म को छिपा लिया...

चलते हैं इस दुनिया में
जैसे हैं राजा सारी ज़मीन के
कोई झाँक के देखे अन्दर तो जाने
हैं मुश्किल कितने अंदाज़ ये,
कि न है कुछ, और न उसे खोने का डर
फिर भी है दुनिया की हर रीत की कद्र,
ठण्ड में तारों की रजाई तले पूरी रात बिता दी
और सूरज की धूप में पत्तों की छाँव बना ली,
आज फिर कुदरत को अपना ग़ुलाम बना लिया
आज फिर हंसी में इक ग़म को छिपा लिया...

न घर है कोई न खून के रिश्ते कोई
पर फिर भी परिवार में हैं लोग कई
हैं एक जैसे सब, बस सबके मुखौटे कुछ अलग,
हर मुखौटे के पीछे है एक टीस अलग
कल मायने रखता नहीं, है आज जीना चुनौती नयी,
जीत पाना पत्थर दिल वालों  की इस दुनिया में
बस है हर दिन की कहानी यही...
आज इस कहानी को लफ़्ज़ों में ढाल दिया
आज फिर हंसी में इक ग़म को छिपा लिया...

Contemplation

When the wind embraces you and raindrops form your coat,
When the world is silently lost into dreams,
When the roads are quiet and the birds at rest,
This heart speaks like it never did...

When the heartbeat is the music,
And winds are the song,
When all you wish for
Is for the night to be long...
Long enough so that there is no dawn
Long enough for you to think on
All what life had brought to you,
All what life has taken from you,
All that you wish for,
All that wasn't yours...
When everything around is quiet and still
The heart speaks like it never did...

You close your eyes and feel the breeze
Chilly yet warm with memories,
The darkness of the night it seems
Penetrating through your million dreams,
Dreams you saw and realised,
Dreams you wish to bring to life,
It is then that the heart agrees
That life is not always what we want it to be.
Sometimes it is sweet and sometimes sour,
Can prick like a thorn yet remain beautiful as a flower.
For it is in then that time stands still
When the soul embraces life as it is
And the heart speaks like it never did...

Life: An Insatiable Appetite

I am in 'my' Gwalior for the past couple of days and as much as I enjoy being here, I have a sense of losing something at the same time. This is my last evening here and so I was sitting with my mom simply chatting. It has become some sort of ritual for us. My last evening before heading to Delhi is always spent lying beside mom lazily and chatting with her on all sorts of subjects while she sits there, patiently listening to me and answering all my questions. It is something that sums up my vacations - a long chat with her, about everything, accompanied by something to eat and followed by a piece of advice. This evening she said something to me which I guess I am going to remember more than any other advice that she ever gave me. Just when I was having a feeling of sadness about losing something she stepped in as my savior and I don't know whether she knew what I was going through or not, but her advice seemed just what I needed at the moment. She told me "No one ever gets everything. Life is mean to each one of us and hence it is important to know the art of detaching oneself from everything in life. Never make anything or anyone so important that if they ever leave, they take a part of your soul with them."  I realized how true these words are. We all have a long list of what we want from life. Some of us want to be rich, some happy, some both rich and happy, some long for that one special person in their life and some long for a whole new life. We are never satisfied with what we have. And the worse part is that not many of us know how to lose in life. From our childhood we are taught to fight to win, to survive. Unfortunately, we are never taught how to deal with failures in life. And even though we might be taught how to deal with failure in examinations at school and college, none of us are taught how to deal with failure in love, or in life. 

A Whole New World

A bird out of her nest…
The cosiness, the warmth
Somwhere it is left…
For now she is out in the sky
Learning to abide by
The new rules of life…

A new pair of wings
A dive and a swing
And she sways with the air
Completely unaware
Of this pleasant seaming world outside
Which had been in her dreams
Which she saw form the inside
Of her nest…
That security, the protection is gone
All she is left with is this unrest
Of making attempts to survive
In this world of dreams
Which demands her to fight…
Fight her way through the rest
As now she no more is in her nest
And the cosiness, the warmth
Somewhere it is left…

It all seemed so easy
The nest so warm and yet breezy
But now the meanings have changed
The weather no more seems to be the same
The sunlight’s warmth has turned into heat
And rain into storms that try to beat
her passion, her strength
To be yet again able to strike
On her target perfectly right.
But she ain’t weak so as to bow
To these storms and allow
Them to take over her dreams…
The sky no more seems to be blue
And nor is the grass green…
The true colours of the world
Aren’t a pleasant scene
But these are the rules for her to abide
With only a virtual support by her side
Now that she is out of her nest
The cosiness, the warmth,
Somewhere it is left…

Resting in God's lap, I was enjoying the heaven
When suddenly I was told to leave.
I thought I was being sent to some prison,
But what I saw on opening my eyes was hard to believe...
The face of an angel with tears in her eyes,
And people all around her bubbling with joy...
Scared to be among strange faces
I let out a cry,
Your arms around me I felt all of a sudden
And it was then I knew it was more comforting than heaven...

The language I knew was not familier to all,
But you could look into my eyes and know it all...
My needs you knew without a word,
My silence you understood,
When no one in this world could...
I held your finger and took the first step,
Unaware of what lay ahead,
But your presence made all my fears disappear,
And the blurred visions became clear...

My identity to me was given by you,
They told me I was but a part of you...
My name they said was given by you,
'Mother' - they said mine were you...
The pride of being born to you,
I have felt since the day I have known you...

I stepped into a new age,
leaving behind those golden days...
Every step I took ahead,
Reminded me of what I had left...
Our dreams, I thought was what I was trying to persue,
But in this struggle, I somewhere lost me and you...
The distance we travelled together to get me here,
Doesn't allow me to turn back and again be there...
Doesn't allow me to rest in your lap anymore,
And success now tastes bitter than failure...
For though I have moved up on the ladder,
It has only left me sadder...
The happiness of seeing that smile on your face
and the brightness in your eyes,
Is the only force that keeps me alive...
Alive, though a part of me is already dead inside...
For you I walk this path now...
And what seemed heaven has been lost for long now...
And it's the prison where I live now...
It's the prison where I live now...

Somewhere I lost Me...

Everything's here, right here with me,
But something's missing, somewhere inside me...
A cobweb of dreams,
An open sky of possibilities...
In the midst of all the buzz, 
Did I somewhere lose me?


Perhaps like the silent song
That's lost in the rustling of leaves,
Or like the hidden treasure
Of all my beliefs,
I know its there somewhere...
I know its here somewhere...
Just that I somehow fail to see,
What really is missing deep down in me...
What is it really that makes me feel incomplete?
In the midst of all the buzz,
Did I somewhere lose me?


The velvet sky with shining stars,
The dark night that's so close and yet so far,
The lonely moon, a prisoner
The narrator of the tale, and himself it's listener...
For though the stars are all around
Yet they are way too far to hear the sound,
The sound of all he wishes to say...
The stories of his journeys to lands far away...
I too have a lot to say,
Somehow everyone seems far away
To be able to listen to the songs inside
My heart and read what's hidden in my eyes...
It now seems tough to find
All that brought peace to my mind...
I know its that what makes me feel
Somewhere, something is missing in me...
It is what makes me see
That in all this buzz
Perhaps I somewhere lost Me...

Sounds Of Silence

It is rare that we get time to just sit quietly and observe everything around us - the fast moving traffic, the sounds of the vehicles, the vehicles, the people stuck in the cobwebs of their daily lives and the never-ending run for being successful. There is just so much happening everywhere, every single second. But how many times do we sit and observe all of this? How many times do we sit and think of the ones we love, the ones we lost? Or how many times we actually tell our moms how much they mean to us and how secure it feels to know that Dad is around here somewhere? Well, today I got this chance of being just with myself. I sat in the balcony of my rented apartment at my favorite spot in the whole house listening to some beautiful instrumentals. The Ring Road seemed visibly bright and full of life with it's never-ending traffic. Under the dark night sky, the halogen street lights lit the road as if it were day. The cool breeze wiped my face softly and helped me to calm myself down. It's been about two and a half years since I moved to Delhi and yet tonight seems to be the first night that made me go down the memory lane. For the first time, I was thinking about Gwalior and Delhi, the changes that had taken place in these years, of the dimension this time had added to my personality. While in Gwalior, I never felt the way I do today. I sit here asking myself just one question - Is this me?? I guess that's to a great extent that happens to most of us who move from a small town to a metro. Firstly, it takes time for us to understand and accept the new ways of lifestyle and then when we learn how to face this attractive but brutal side of the world, we tend to lose on our own self to a great extent. But that I guess is the greatest challenge of moving to a new place - being able to accept the new lifestyle without losing on our actual identity. I guess I needed this night's silence to be with myself to think of what I was beginning to lose. I guess we all need it. We all need a break from this monotonous and vigorous life to be with our own self for a while and figure out who we are and what we are missing on to. You never know what all the silence speaks to you. All you need to do is sit and hear the sounds of silence. After all, we have just this life... why not LIVE?